He's home, the sun is shining, and he says he is very happy to be Home. Willie was thrilled to see him, and required being in his lap for extended periods. Dad's fine with that, and sneaking treats to him.
The following are just random notes. I'm posting it as more of a journal for me than anything. Please don't feel you are required to read on, though you are welcome to comment.
The new hip is working nicely, scar has healed well, and he has no pain from it.
He managed to get some orange chicken with rice and a small amount of a protein shake down after he got home. I fixed him corned beef hash with an egg last night, it was his request. It was good, but he struggled to swallow even a few bites. I've talked with his oncologist and the ENT surgeon, and this difficulty swallowing some things is part of what is at this stage. His coughing to clear his throat is about the same. It is frustrating to him that he can't eat many of his favorites without his choking. And we face the aspirating problem.
He is very weak and only manages very short distances with his walker. Then he sets in it and I push him where he wants to go. We have a wheel chair (left over from Mom) and a hoveround that he used to get back and forth to the mailbox(we live on a hill). I'm not sure about him getting too dependent on mech things to do things for him, need to talk to PT & his doc about that, hopefully Monday.
This morning he was up for a while, got him changed, his three E's in, meds and eye drops in, and gave his legs a massage, and got part of a banana protein shake down him. He wanted his favorite CD of Roy Orbison on the whole house stereo system, so we were rock'n the house, and he spent some time in his den on his computer. He's back in bed now, and comfortable.
I have a dear friend that has been occasionally going to see him with me. She talks to him like this is just a minor bump in the road. I know that she means well, but it isn't the reality, and he & I know it.
He and I both know why he has been so adamant about getting home.
He and I both know why he has been so adamant about getting home.
Monday, his home health caregiver will be here, as well as PT and a few others, that he enjoys interacting with. Hopefully they will cheer him up.
Lots of orders for his care came home with him. He is on nocturnal oxygen, so they showed up not long after he got home and explained the equipment to me. I rearranged some things in his bedroom and that's all in place. He is to use it when he naps, as well.
That gets a little problematic as he is prone to just dozing off in his
chair. Last night was a process to get him ready for bed. Remove the 3
E's: ears (hearing aides), eyes (glasses), eats (false teeth), put in
his eye drops, turn on the big oxy machine, adjust it, put the nasal
cannula on him, and the finger oxy tester thingy... but we gott'er done
and him tucked in for the night. Oh, and put the other things that he
thought he might need on his night stand, including the big Donger (cowbell/handle)!
(I told him he better damn well be dying if he rings that thing in the middle of the night. He laughed, and said "Aah I Love You, Sissy, Thank You for taking care of me." "I Love You Dad, and you are most welcome.")
(I told him he better damn well be dying if he rings that thing in the middle of the night. He laughed, and said "Aah I Love You, Sissy, Thank You for taking care of me." "I Love You Dad, and you are most welcome.")
I first read "orange chicken with rice as a part of a protein shake." Holy crapola - how do you turn orange chicken and rice into a shake. No wonder he won't eat. Oh wait, the shake was separate.
ReplyDeleteThen I kind of stumbled on the big Donger. Never mind what I thought. Not important.
And, dear Lord in heaven, if you have to put his teeth in don't do what I did to my mom (RIP) I didn't know that you only put a few spots of denture stuff in the trough. I filled the whole damn thing up. When it came time to take them out I almost had to put my knee on her forehead and pry them out with the end of hammer. It didn't help that we both got to laughing so hard we almost spit up.
I'm glad he's home and he'll be better after a few days rest. Don't wear yourself out. He needs you right now.
Adrienne,
DeleteOMG that is beyond funny about your mom's false teeth!
My nephew in Ideeho makes Dongers, and I have inserted a photo for those prone to think it is something else...
Keeping him hydrated is my biggest hurdle right now, and I will address that with his Doc Monday.
I'm laughing my fool head off at the denture story. In fact, I'm laughing so hard even the cat woke up and is looking at me. Only those of us who've been through it understand, maybe. My friends still don't know why certain things set me hysterical.
DeleteGlad I could bring some cheer to your evening, Shore. I'm sure my mom is looking down and thinking the same thing. I remember her saying (when the uppers wouldn't budge), "How much adhesive did you put on them?" When I told her she started to laugh and it went downhill from there. It took at least 30 minutes to pry them out.
DeleteNever an easy routine but certainly worth doing when it is for someone you love. He does appreciate you and loves you too.
ReplyDeleteGranny Annie,
DeleteNo one ever said it was going to be easy, but it is well worth it.
Good to hear he's back home and resting comfortably, Brig!
ReplyDeletedrjim,
DeleteIt is good news!
So THAT is a donger.
ReplyDeleteI'm happy that Dad is back and will soon be up to his full mischief.
LL,
DeleteYou need a new Donger? I can arrange for you to get one!
He is getting a bit better each day home, Yay!
Glad he is home. Treasure this time Brig, it's important for both of you.
ReplyDeleteTell him you love him and give him lots and lots of ice cream. Hugs.
Chickenmon,
DeleteI am too! He has slowed up on the ice cream as it causes problems with swallowing. I have found a few other treats that he can handle a little easier.
So glad he is home Brig. Prayers up for you both. His happiness quotient must be a lot higher now. Love and hugs.
ReplyDeleteCelia,
DeleteThanks, and prayers are always appreciated!
I'm just so glad he's home. Yes, home care can be complicated, but it sounds like you're settling well into a routine. I hope the problems with the aspiration ease. Man does not live by banana shakes alone.
ReplyDeleteshoreacres,
DeleteI am glad he is home! Aspiration problems are not going to go away but he he dealing with that fairly well.
I agree with Adrienne...don't wear yourself out, Brig. If you think some peppery olive oil in a smoothie would help not only his appetite but also his plumbing system, let me know and I'll send some up your way. All kidding aside, this is a rich, very rich, time in both of your lives. This is how they did "it" in ancient days, not in hospitals, not in assisted living homes but right there in the family home. Your will, love, and humor will guide you both. Here's to being home!
ReplyDeleteCheri,
DeleteI have been using olive oil in a lot of his dishes. Thanks for the offer, as I know all the work that went into producing your fantastic oil.
Taking it one day at a time, and I will keep him home if at all possible. I am very thankful that I have this time with him.
Precious time together. You are doing a great job but try not to forget you need rest too.
ReplyDeleteChanges,
DeleteIt is indeed. Thanks for the kind words.
Recovery is a process... As others have said, remember to take time for yourself too! Glad he's home and remember an hour of surgery equals a month of recovery.
ReplyDeleteOld NFO,
DeleteI had not heard the hour of surgery = a month of recovery. He is doing a little better each day, now that he is home.
Caring for an aging parent is so difficult. Take care of yourself in this as he needs you not to get sick and sadly the caregivers are at risk with the emotional stress.
ReplyDeleteRain,
DeleteIt can be difficult, but that is just a small part of the journey.
I am very glad I took caregiver classes for a while after I moved up here to take care of mother. They provided answers that weren't out there elsewhere.
Wonderful he is home and in no pain. Such a blessing. You are becoming quite the care giver. Lucky you have him home, lucky he has you.
ReplyDeleteA Patti,
DeleteWe are blessed in that for sure!
What Chickenmom said, "Treasure the time you have." I guess I went through that 4 times. Her's and mine. You learn as you go as nothing can prepare you. Life seems so unfair sometimes, but the circle is complete. Put the memories with your other keepsakes.
ReplyDeleteBarney,
DeleteThanks for your good and true words. I was here to care for mother til she passed, so have been down this path.
Talk to the MD about thicket if you don't already have some. It helps thicken up liquids and helps lessen aspiration problems. Enjoy your time together, and remember, just getting home is tiring for someone your Dad's age, give him a few days to recover from the trip. And Old NFO is correct...it takes far longer to recover from surgery, especially if you are over 75 than most folks think. Be patient and do what he can.
ReplyDeleteAlso talk with the MD about Hospice if this is g
(Stupid computer)
ReplyDeletegetting to the end of the line, I don't know if it is or not, but Hospice is all about staying home as long as possible. They can put supports in to help you out, as well as help keep Dad comfortable.
Suz,
DeleteThanks,for all the very good advice!
I am aware of thicket (thanks to my SIL)and realize that recovery is slow at his age, but he doesn't think that...lol.
We have a good support system in place, both medical and otherwise, which is awesome.
Sounds like a new routine needs to be acquired. He sounds like me, with the oxygen thing. It looks like I'll need it every night while sleeping too, but that's only at 6000' feet.
ReplyDeleteWoodsterman,
DeleteIt appears you have been living the high life a little too long...
Seriously take care!